Sexual Intimacy
Sex. One of those words and topics that many feel uneasy to talk about, especially with children and teens. Personally, I think talking about sex, in the right way and at the right time, is something that more people in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints should be more willing to open up about. There are so many people that I know that have been affected by the lack of knowledge on the topic. Properly teaching our children about the sacredness and importance of sexual intimacy, will create a more healthy environment when discussing this topic. Teens will feel like they can openly talk about with their parents, and it won't feel like a sin when you are wanting to ask questions.
In the book Successful Marriages and Families, it relays a story of a young teenager laying in bed with her mom and the daughter asks, "Mom, is sex better than candy?" I can only imagine how many mothers would be appalled by the question, especially coming from a 13-year-old. I hope that we can learn a few things from this mother's response; she says, "Oh yes, dear, with your husband in an eternal marriage, sex is far better than candy." As the book states, her reply to this question can teach us 3 things when confronted with a question about sex from our children. The first, "sexual relationships should occur in the proper context of marriage; second, that in this proper context, sex brings joy; and third, that it is okay to talk about sex with a parent." I hope that in the coming years, sex won't be a topic that is avoided; but rather, it will be used as a teaching experience and how important marriage is when talking about sexual relationships.
I strongly believe that if we take this topic and turn it into a teaching moment rather than some sort of lecture or scolding, our children are going to be more willing to openly discuss these kinds of topics with us; and if they do end up getting into a bad situation, they know they can talk to us about it. In order for us to effectively teach our children, they first have to "like" us. We need to work on building our relationship with them and building trust along with it. My goal is to raise my children to want to do the right thing, but WHEN they make a mistake, of any kind, I want them to know they can ALWAYS come to me. I won't be perfect at this, but I am going to try. And that's all we can ever really do, is to try to be better, teach better, and lead better.
In the book Successful Marriages and Families, it relays a story of a young teenager laying in bed with her mom and the daughter asks, "Mom, is sex better than candy?" I can only imagine how many mothers would be appalled by the question, especially coming from a 13-year-old. I hope that we can learn a few things from this mother's response; she says, "Oh yes, dear, with your husband in an eternal marriage, sex is far better than candy." As the book states, her reply to this question can teach us 3 things when confronted with a question about sex from our children. The first, "sexual relationships should occur in the proper context of marriage; second, that in this proper context, sex brings joy; and third, that it is okay to talk about sex with a parent." I hope that in the coming years, sex won't be a topic that is avoided; but rather, it will be used as a teaching experience and how important marriage is when talking about sexual relationships.
I strongly believe that if we take this topic and turn it into a teaching moment rather than some sort of lecture or scolding, our children are going to be more willing to openly discuss these kinds of topics with us; and if they do end up getting into a bad situation, they know they can talk to us about it. In order for us to effectively teach our children, they first have to "like" us. We need to work on building our relationship with them and building trust along with it. My goal is to raise my children to want to do the right thing, but WHEN they make a mistake, of any kind, I want them to know they can ALWAYS come to me. I won't be perfect at this, but I am going to try. And that's all we can ever really do, is to try to be better, teach better, and lead better.
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